- 01 Apr 2008, 07:08
#1083535
Vecina me poznaje po mojim "help me please" temama. Neke izvanredno nerviram, drugi me dosta gotive. Ovog puta ipak otvaram temu jer se ZAISTA osecam uzasno i zelim da svoju bol podelim (makar i putem interneta) sa nekim. Nikada se ranije nisam ovako osecao - Sinoc sam raskinuo sa deckom.
***Prvo da pojasnim svima koji do sada nisu shvatili da imam iskrivljen smisao za humor da NISAM sponzorusha, niti tucachica, nego da obozavam da se zezam i da sam veoma otvoren. Vecinu help tema sam pisao upravo kako bih ubio dosadu i zezao se na forumu, ali ovog puta vam najiskrenije, verovatno i po prvi put otvaram srce i govorim vam kako se duboko u sebi osecam.
Dakle sinoc sam raskinuo sa Robertom. Bili smo zajedno 5 meseci, i jako sam se vezao za njega. Iako su postojale su odredjene prepreke koje su meni predstavljale problem, bilo nam je obojici veoma lepo. Bili smo drugovi i ljubavnici, imali smo toliko lepih trenutaka. Ovo pismo sam mu sinoc ostavio nakon sto sam zakljucio da zaista ne bih mogao tako da se izrazim uzivo, i otvorim mu svoje srce:
"Dear Robbie,
It’s been almost five months since we’ve met each other. What an amazing guy you are!
After spending our day together, I thought again about how much different we are. I often think about that, and what makes me sad the most is that the person you’ve got to know is just the shadow of “real me” – the guy who used to laugh, smile, and perceive the world in a very positive way has now changed, through the constant struggle for my dreams. I am worried, stressed, and I have a hard time to relax, enjoy the things, and go with the flow…
I guess why I am writing this is to thank you from the heart for the wonderful times we have spent together, but also to let you know that I believe that it is time for of us to move on.
You have a nice, sorted out life. You have achieved most of your goals, and now it is your time to relax and enjoy the life. I in contrast have a very stressed life, full of concerns, and there I no fun or relaxed attitude for me.
I always imagined a great relationship to be the one where people talk, laugh, do things together, and we will never be able to do that.
I wish you to find someone who will be better for you. Someone who will be able to go out with you, have fun, laugh with you. I still have a lot to go – because as you said: “You’re a young tree that is just putting down roots and establishing yourself…”
I’ve learned so much from you, and I thank you for that.
Please keep smiling as always, and if you ever need anything, let me know – I will always be there for you."
--Stefan
Ne znam da li me vise boli to sto sam raskinuo sa njim ili to sto mi se danas nije javio, samo znam da jedino o cemu je mislim je on i da nista drugo ne mogu da radim. Ovo mi se desava po prvi put u zivotu. Svakih 5 minuta gledam u telefon i pitam se da li je procitao pismo iako u dusi znam da jeste. Potajno se nadam se da ce da me zove iako je gotovo, i da ce sve da bude kao pre, ali nije se javio ceo dan... Mozda nije procitao pismo... Ma mora da jeste! Da li je nesto drugo u pitanju?!
Kako boli, koliko li ce ovo da traje...
Boze, samo da ovaj dan prodje!
***Prvo da pojasnim svima koji do sada nisu shvatili da imam iskrivljen smisao za humor da NISAM sponzorusha, niti tucachica, nego da obozavam da se zezam i da sam veoma otvoren. Vecinu help tema sam pisao upravo kako bih ubio dosadu i zezao se na forumu, ali ovog puta vam najiskrenije, verovatno i po prvi put otvaram srce i govorim vam kako se duboko u sebi osecam.
Dakle sinoc sam raskinuo sa Robertom. Bili smo zajedno 5 meseci, i jako sam se vezao za njega. Iako su postojale su odredjene prepreke koje su meni predstavljale problem, bilo nam je obojici veoma lepo. Bili smo drugovi i ljubavnici, imali smo toliko lepih trenutaka. Ovo pismo sam mu sinoc ostavio nakon sto sam zakljucio da zaista ne bih mogao tako da se izrazim uzivo, i otvorim mu svoje srce:
"Dear Robbie,
It’s been almost five months since we’ve met each other. What an amazing guy you are!
After spending our day together, I thought again about how much different we are. I often think about that, and what makes me sad the most is that the person you’ve got to know is just the shadow of “real me” – the guy who used to laugh, smile, and perceive the world in a very positive way has now changed, through the constant struggle for my dreams. I am worried, stressed, and I have a hard time to relax, enjoy the things, and go with the flow…
I guess why I am writing this is to thank you from the heart for the wonderful times we have spent together, but also to let you know that I believe that it is time for of us to move on.
You have a nice, sorted out life. You have achieved most of your goals, and now it is your time to relax and enjoy the life. I in contrast have a very stressed life, full of concerns, and there I no fun or relaxed attitude for me.
I always imagined a great relationship to be the one where people talk, laugh, do things together, and we will never be able to do that.
I wish you to find someone who will be better for you. Someone who will be able to go out with you, have fun, laugh with you. I still have a lot to go – because as you said: “You’re a young tree that is just putting down roots and establishing yourself…”
I’ve learned so much from you, and I thank you for that.
Please keep smiling as always, and if you ever need anything, let me know – I will always be there for you."
--Stefan
Ne znam da li me vise boli to sto sam raskinuo sa njim ili to sto mi se danas nije javio, samo znam da jedino o cemu je mislim je on i da nista drugo ne mogu da radim. Ovo mi se desava po prvi put u zivotu. Svakih 5 minuta gledam u telefon i pitam se da li je procitao pismo iako u dusi znam da jeste. Potajno se nadam se da ce da me zove iako je gotovo, i da ce sve da bude kao pre, ali nije se javio ceo dan... Mozda nije procitao pismo... Ma mora da jeste! Da li je nesto drugo u pitanju?!
Kako boli, koliko li ce ovo da traje...
Boze, samo da ovaj dan prodje!